Never Ending Story

Does anyone else ever feel like they do so much crap during the day, but nothing ever seems to get done?? And does anyone else ever feel the urge to take their child and duct tape him to his bed and leave? Not that I would ever think a thought like that. I was just wondering ;)

If It's Not One Thing...

It's another. That's right. After sitting all day wondering when the next asshole is gonna strike, and either break into a house, or steal another vehicle, neither happened. That I know of. But lucky me, I get jumped by a freakin dog. Well not exactly jumped, but that little prick came at me. Let me give you a little background info.

Yesterday afternoon my dogs were going crazy out in the backyard. So I look out the front window, where I can see the side of the house where they were and there was a dog. My natural assumption was that it was our neighbors dog Angel, who is a little white rat looking thing. Well she always craps in my yard so I went out to shoo her away. I walk out the front door, look over and there is a huge white pit bull standing by my gate. OK, now before I say anything else, I have to say that I have/had this unnatural non-fear of dogs. Don't ask me why. I have never been afraid of dogs and have never been afraid of being bitten or chased or anything like that. While others get spooked and run away, I will stand there and have a dual with any damn dog. Whether I have a weapon or not. Hubs says I am stupid and one day I will be bitten, but I always say "lawsuit!" lol But really, it's strange. Anyways, so I go out there and the dog doesn't budge. It stands there by my fence barking. Not just barking, but like the growling, mean barking crap dogs do. So I stomp my foot. Nothing. So I walk out a little further and it starts to back away. Little further..further...further... finally it backs out of my yard and onto the sidewalk where it proceeds to bark. Finally it turned around and walked down the street.

So then last night, I go to take my trash cans down to the curb and I hear my neighbors dog barking. I looked around to make sure nothing was out of order, and that there was nothing fishy going on. Then out of nowhere that f*cken dog comes out from behind their vehicles. Bastard dog scared the shit out of me. Starts barking.

"Shooo, shooo shoooo." Nothing.

Stomp my feet. Nothing.

Asshole starts walking towards me. Crap. OK. Don't' show fear and don't run.

"Shoooo. Shooo. Shoooo. Get."

Bark, bark, bark, growl.

Crap. OK. Back up slowly to my front door where I have a big metal bat.

It follows me.

"Girly hand me the bat!"

"Huh, what bat?"

Shit, I put it back under my bed. OK, no biggie, the dog seems to have gone away anyways.

Proceed to walk slowly back out to my front drive and get my garbage barrel.

Bark, bark bark.

Bitch. That shithead didn't leave. Just went down the sidewalk a bit. OK, just ignore it and if it comes at me I'll scream bloody murder. I Grab my trash can and proceed down the driveway. That son of a bitch walks towards me again. OK, bitch you wanna play this game fine. So I look around me. Nothing but a freakin rose bush and rocks. Grab a rock. Throw it. Really shitty throw and almost hit neighbors car (never claimed to be a good thrower). Not good. OK, grab the cell phone and call my neighbor.

"Uh Todd (fake name of course lol) it's Choppzs, I'm having a bit of a problem. You see, there's this dog out here and it wont go away (insert fake little nervous laugh). Could you come out here with your gun or something and kill it??? He laughs and bit and says "What are you serious? I'll be right out!"

The dog is still standing there barking and growling and not letting me budge. Every time I tried to move that jerk came closer and closer and all I had was my cell phone. Todd's garage opens up, and out he comes.

"I was gonna paintball the asshole, but I couldn't find my barrel. Where is he?" He comes walking out with a huge fricken hammer. That's right. A hammer. He looked at the dog, and also recognized it from earlier that day. He starts yelling at it and it wasn't gonna back down. That dog has some balls. So he launched at it with the hammer. That got him going. But as soon as Todd would turn around to walk back that stupid dog would come walking back. Anyways, to make a long story short, that doggy got a hammer upside the head. Yelping and barking all the way down the street. What a bastard.

So now I don't have just thieves and kidnappers to worry about, but asshole dogs as well. I think I might call the cops today just to see if they can patrol the area, cause the last thing I need on my conscious is some poor child getting mulled because I didn't at least warn someone of this damn dog.

Just some pics

I Hate Stupid People

OK, why is it that as soon as I start to feel like this town isn't so bad, and we live in one of the safest neighborhoods, some stupid ass thug or thugs has to come along and ruin it. Gosh Dammit! I would have to say it started back around Thanksgiving and hasn't let up since. People going around breaking into homes. Now it has gone from homes to stealing or vandalizing any and all cars that are parked outside. What a bunch of F*ckers! Now I have to get off my lazy ass and walk Girly down to the bus stop at the crack of dawn because the dumb ass pieces of shit have started this crap in the mornings. Going around asking for rides and stuff. And I don't need some lowlife piece of garbage getting their nasty hands on my kid!

So, now that it is 5:30 in the morning, I am dragging ass, and just waiting till the last moment to have to wake the boys. Granted, I am actually dressed, and my hair is combed, and I look like I am awake, but holy crap, I'M NOT! Baby Boy is not letting me sleep. Up all hours of the night, and if I don't nurse him, he wont sleep. But I am putting my foot down. So when I put my foot down, that also means I don't sleep. He screamed for 2 straight hours. That's right. Damn that kid has got a set of lungs. But come on. He's over a year, and wont sleep unless nursed?? Nut uh, I don't think so. Suck it up kid, Mama's titties aren't an all night tap at some bar! So, what did I do you ask? Did I give in? No! Well Yes, sort of. I went in there when he first got up (around 1 am) nursed him, changed him, and put him back down. Then he got back up around 1:30, so I just went him, made sure he had his pacifier and left. That really pissed him off. So that routine lasted about every 1/2 hour till around 4. Finally at 4, I went in, got him out, and rocked with him till he fell asleep lol. So needless to say, I got a good 4 hours of sleep.

This sucks, and for the record, you punk ass bitches that are out robbing people and stuff, YOU SUCK TOO!

Wonderful Night Out!

Saturday was a great day! Hubs surprised me with a night out without the kids. He arranged the sitter, he arranged the dinner, and he also arranged the little teddy bear, chocolates and card that were hidden behind the car seat for me to find! Come now, can you say "AWWWWWW"?? lol It was so sweet. He wanted to give me a belated Valentines Day since he worked all week and we didn't have time or energy to do it on the 14th. We went to eat at a wonderful restaurant called Claimjumpers. If you have ever been there you would know that the food is kick ass and the drinks are even better. I got quite tipsy just off of two drinks (give me a break, I am still nursing, so I haven't had a drink in a long while!! lol). I had a Hawaiian Martini, and a Banana Foster Martini. Yummy!! It was a great evening out without the kids that was long overdue. We don't know many people here yet, and I am way to untrusting to leave the kids with just anyone. It's been almost a year since we have gone out without the kids! That's bad!! lol We definitely need to do it more often!! I got to get dressed up, and be swooned by my sweetie!! lol Sometimes when you don't get out allot, and are with the kids day in and day out, it's so great to feel appreciated, and hear how much you are loved! I Love you Babe, Thank you for the great evening. I know I don't say it enough either, but you are so wonderful, and work so hard. Sometimes I forget just how good I have it!!

Oh and no sex talk yet!! I am procrastinating! lol I am wondering if I should get a book, or if I should just wing it! Tomorrow I tell ya, it's gonna happen. I have to get some balls and talk to my 9 yr. old about the birds and the bees. Come on, how scary can it be?? lol Yikes!

Doing the Bullet Thing...

Only because I am lazy, here goes nothing....

• Finally got my new dishes. That's right, I have been searching all over this stupid town for the new Square Corelle dishes. I finally found them in the town a ways from here. I love them. Beautiful. I haven't had new dishes since we got married 10 years ago, and I thought it was about time.

• I have cleaned so much puke in the last couple days I am ready to hang up the towel. Don't quite know if it's the flu that's been hanging around, or if it's the teeth. Either way, the carpet cleaner hasn't been used this much since we got it!!

• Valentines Day was uneventful! Enough said.

• The weather has been beautiful. Sunny and in the 70's. I could do for some rain and clouds, but this is just fine to open the windows and air out the house. Maybe that'll help rid us of this flu shit.

• Crazy Boy is driving me crazy. He is now telling me to kiss his butt! lol

• Having "The Talk" this weekend with Girly. That's right. Hell has frozen over, and pigs have begun to fly. I can't believe I already have to have this talk. She's been asking lots of questions and is probably hearing things at school. I figure I'd better tell her the correct facts before she hears something that is vulgar and disgusting. Geesh, I think I'll go and puke now!! lol

• Same shit, different day!

My Baby is so Smart!

That's right, my Baby Boy is sooo smart. No, I am not being one of those retard mothers, who has the world's dumbest kid, and still boasts about how they are so smart and blah blah blah. What I am saying is true. Baby Boy is now telling us to change his diaper. That's right! He doesn't say it of course. He signs it. Yes, we started baby sign language with Crazy, and have kept it going with Baby Boy. He now knows the signs for milk, all done, more, and change my diaper. Granted, he isn't so smart in the crawling department, but damn my kid can tell me he shit his pants! Now if he could just change his own crappy diaper that would make me the world's luckiest mother! Now Crazy on the other hand, well, he doesn't have to tell me he crapped his pants. He's talented like that. He can let off the world's worst stench, and that is how he tells me he needs his pants changed. Either the stench or the relentless groaning that comes from behind my couch twice a day. Either way, he's letting me know to get prepared. Now that my dears...is talent...and brains!

Blah Blah Blah

Not a damn thing going on here. We are all sick. Hubs has some sort of flu, Crazy and I have some sort of cold, and Baby Boy is teething. Fun times I tell ya.

I look at my sister's site and wish we were there. Damn this state! lol Why can't we at least get some rain or overcast skies or something? But soon enough it will be in the hundreds and I will be bitching and moaning some more. Be prepared!

I wish I could shove a sock or rag or something in Crazy's mouth. Would that be grounds for jail?? Cause I can't stand the damn whining anymore!! It's getting to the point where I just want to shoot myself. Point blank in the head. Die a quick and painless death. But with my luck, I would miss and have to be taken to the hospital and acquire thousands and thousands of medical bills. And in the process, I would probably still have to listen to Crazy's whining. So...maybe I'll just have to put up with it. That, or shove him in a closet somewhere. Or give him to someone. You think if I put a sign on him that said "Free to Good Home" and stuck him outside.... Just a thought!

I saw this on Jamie's site and thought I would go take a look. It's worth a shot ahh??
http://www.5minutesformom.com/902/i-love-contests/

I LOVE jewelry and thought this might be my chance to get some more! lol